He has at least found love. But what’s dowdy contentment got to do with
sporting dominance, youthful power and all of the other brand values that
attracted a certain Spanish banking behemoth to golf’s one-time hot new
star?
Jenson
Button is keeping the dream alive by remaining an active participant
in the glamorous world of Formula One, rubbing shoulders with style icons
like Bernie Ecclestone and Eddie Jordan.
But behind the glitz he’s also had a miserable year, finishing in the top five
only once all season, lying stranded in ninth in the drivers’ championship
and feuding with new team-mate Sergio Perez, a man who’s somehow made Lewis
Hamilton appear vaguely charming by comparison.
Jessica Ennis-Hill’s case is the saddest of all. She’s struggled with a wonky
Achilles which has kept her out of meaningful competition since the
Olympics.
She competed in last weekend’s Anniversary Games but was markedly off the
pace. Now she’s pulled out of the World Championships, which is sad news for
heptathlon fans everywhere.
The cause for all of this unhappiness, this disappointment and these
only-mediocre sporting performances? The advert. The cursed, evil advert.
You can’t expect creepy teleportation into people’s bathrooms and living rooms
not to take its toll. You can’t make a deal with the financial devil at the
crossroads of your career and not expect to have to pay him back with a
little of your talent. You can’t wear a race-driver’s suit out in public. It
just looks wrong.
Santander should have known better, and should never have press-ganged our
poor sporting superheroes into taking part.
It’s enough to make you think twice about the banking industry. That, and the
whole unprecedented global crash thing…